DOJ Indicts ‘Squatty Potty’ Inventor For Reams of Baby P*rn

/script type=”text/javascript” src=”https://app.getresponse.com/view_webform_v2.js?u=S6bT5&webforms_id=A25R”>

Originally published via Armageddon Prose:

Gone are the innocence-soaked days of yore when the public at large bathed in blissful unawareness that the entire Western world is covertly run by mentally ill and possibly demon-possessed pedophiles.

Related: Converted Pagan Headhunters and the Shining City on a Hill

Besieged on all sides by PDF files we are.

If the Epstein Files — replete with cryptic references to “grape soda,” “beef jerky,” and “pizza” as obvious euphemisms for something, likely sex-trafficked children — didn’t remove all doubt on that score, we have yet another exhibit for the evidential archive.

You might recall the unsettling 2015 advertisement for the “Squatty Potty” in which an anthropomorphic squatting unicorn poops out rainbow-colored ice cream, which is then distributed to several children to lap up for the camera.

Amazing stuff.

Related: ‘Transage’: Adults Who Sexually Identify as Toddlers

We now have, perhaps, a bit more insight into the deranged mind behind that marketing campaign, in that the founder of Squatty Potty, Robert Edwards, has been brought up on charges of receiving child sexual abuse material (CSAM) over a period no shorter than four and a half years, some of which he allegedly purchased through PayPal.

Via United States Department of Justice (emphasis added):

“An indictment was unsealed today in the District of Utah following the arrest of a Southern Utah entrepreneur, and original co-founder and creator of the “Squatty Potty,” after he was charged for receiving sexually explicit images of a child.

Robert Edwards, 50, of Ivins, Utah, was indicted by a federal grand jury on February 10, 2026. He was arrested on February 12, 2026, in Washington County, Utah. During his initial appearance on the indictment, he pleaded not guilty and was remanded to the U.S. Marshal Service by U.S. Magistrate Judge Paul Kohler in St. George.

According to the allegations in court documents, beginning in March 2021, and continuing through November 2025, in the District of Utah, and elsewhere, Edwards knowingly received multiple images of child sexual abuse material (CSAM). In March 2021, an undercover FBI agent assumed the identity of an online profile account and joined a group chat used to trade child sexual abuse material. The online meeting room was viewing a collection of child sexual abuse material videos, which were being streamed on the main screen. Participants in the meeting were visible, including one user later identified as Edwards.

As alleged in court documents, the investigation continued and in May 2025, FBI agents learned that Edwards was suspected of purchasing additional child sexual abuse material via his PayPal account, which flagged four transactions involving Edwards’ account as possibly related to CSAM. On November 4, 2025, law enforcement executed a search warrant on Edwards’s person and residence. Agents seized a cell phone from his vehicle, which contained multiple videos and images of child sexual abuse material, some of which downloaded onto the cell phone just two weeks before the search warrant was executed. At Edwards’s residence, law enforcement seized additional devices and found additional child sexual abuse material files.

Edwards is charged with receipt of child pornography. His detention hearing is scheduled for March 2, 2026, at 10:00 a.m. in courtroom 2B at the courthouse located at 206 West Tabernacle Street, St. George, Utah 84470.”

—————————————–

[If you appreciate Armageddon Prose, please consider a $5/month or $50/year Substack subscription or a one-time digital “coffee” donation. For alternative means of patronage, email benbartee@protonmail.com.]

——————————————

In related news, continuing with the “pedophiles abound” theme, in yet another major setback for the “trannies aren’t wildly disproportionately mentally ill deviants relative to the general population” narrative, in November of last year, the much-celebrated “first openly transgender lawmaker” elected at a state or federal level, Stacie-Marie Laughton, was caught recruiting his girlfriend, a daycare worker, to obtain pornographic images of the children in her custody that she then shared with him.

Related: ‘Adult Baby’ Terrorizes Multiple Daycares With Feces

Via The Boston Globe (emphasis added):

“A former New Hampshire state lawmaker and her one-time romantic partner have pleaded guilty to taking and exchanging explicit images of children at a Massachusetts daycare in 2023, federal prosecutors said Wednesday.

Stacie Marie Laughton, 41, a former New Hampshire state representative from Nashua, N.H., was first arrested in July 2023 after investigators found she had received explicit images of children from her former partner, 40-year-old Lindsay Groves of Hudson, N.H.

Groves took the photos of nude three- to five-year-olds at Creative Minds Early Learning Center in Tyngsborough, where she worked from May 2022 until her own arrest in June 2023…

Laughton, a Democrat, was first elected to the New Hampshire House in 2012 and was believed to be the first transgender person elected to the state legislature.”

The Boston Globe, in the above article, curiously waited until the eight paragraph to identify Stacie Marie Laughton as either a Democrat or the first tranny statewide office-holder in the country while also bizarrely, but not unexpectedly, referring to him as “her” throughout.

Talk about burying the lede!

Benjamin Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile (now available in paperback), is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

Follow AP on X.

Subscribe (for free) to Armageddon Prose and its dystopian sister, Armageddon Safari.

Support AP’s independent journalism with a one-off, hassle-free “digital coffee” tip or Patreon.

Bitcoin public address: bc1qvq4hgnx3eu09e0m2kk5uanxnm8ljfmpefwhawv